This work is an attempt to sketch the logical structure of tracklocross, a hybrid sport that exists at the nexus of cycling, off-road chaos, and the deep yearning for unnecessary suffering. The truths herein are self-evident to anyone who has ever attempted to pedal a tracklocross bike over an unreasonably placed railway track in the middle of a soggy field.
1. The world is everything that is the case.
1.1 The world of tracklocross is the sum total of its terrain.
1.2 This terrain consists of mud, gravel, grass, sand, occasional tarmac, and at least one obstacle that makes no sense.
1.21 That which cannot be ridden over must be run over, often while carrying one’s bike.
1.22 If you can ride it, you must ride it, even if it is wildly inadvisable.
2. What is the case—a Tracklocross course—consists of arrangements of obstacles and suffering.
2.1 Obstacles are the logical forms of tracklocross.
2.11 The essence of an obstacle is that it tests the rider’s commitment to poor life choices.
2.12 Obstacles can be categorised as natural (roots, rocks, mud) or artificial (stairs, barriers, “creative” course design).
2.13 The greatest obstacle of all is the rider’s own despair.
3. A thought is a Tracklocross rider’s attempt to make sense of the course.
3.1 A thought reflects the reality of the course but not its essence.
3.11 For example: “I can ride that,” reflects reality but does not grasp the full truth of what will occur.
3.12 Reality, in turn, will reply: “No, you cannot.”
3.2 To think is to suffer; to suffer is to understand.
4. A proposition is a description of a section of the course.
4.1 Propositions can be true (e.g., “This corner is slippery”) or false (e.g., “This corner is manageable”).
4.11 The truth-value of a proposition is only revealed through the rider’s bodily impact with the ground.
4.12 The ground is the final arbiter of all arguments in Tracklocross.
4.2 A course map is a logical picture of the world, but it lies.
5. The logical structure of the course is made manifest through the race.
5.1 The rider’s interaction with the course defines their experience of it.
5.11 Whereof one cannot pedal, thereof one must dismount.
5.12 To ride is to will. To will is to fail.
5.13 To carry one’s bike is to ascend beyond the limits of pedalling; it is to achieve enlightenment through burden.
6. The limits of my legs are the limits of my world.
6.1 What I cannot ride, I must run. What I cannot run, I must crawl.
6.2 If you finish, you win, regardless of what place you come in.
6.21 To finish is to transcend. To DNF (Did Not Finish) is to remain trapped in the illusion of mastery.
6.3 The course does not care for your suffering, nor should it.
7. Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must hydrate.
7.1 The true essence of tracklocross cannot be expressed in words but only in the rhythmic crunch of gravel under tyres, the squelch of mud underfoot, and the existential howl of a rider attempting to remount a bike on a steep incline.
7.2 After the race, in the pub, all contradictions dissolve into beer and camaraderie.
Epilogue
The task of understanding tracklocross is the task of understanding oneself. To engage in tracklocross is not merely to race but to enter into a dialectic with mud, gravity, and one’s own foolish aspirations. Through this dialogue, we may glimpse, if only fleetingly, the profound truth: that tracklocross is life itself, and life is suffering—but with beer at the end.
Fiefdom Tracklocross 
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